i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize
