I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
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