Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
