hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
