This girl is more easily done than said...
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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