the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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