We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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