"it" just moved
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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