And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
