Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize