I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
