I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I didn't notice because vodka
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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