i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
