i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
