They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
this boner is exhausting
No subtext here. People are naked.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
NoShamevember. You game?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
