I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
