So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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