I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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