That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
