I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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