the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize