okay pat passed out under dana's car
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize