His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
