Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize