The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Randomize
