If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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