@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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