Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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