Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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