Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
