dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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