Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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