I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
is that a dick in a sweater?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
