So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
