Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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