I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
