So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
