The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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