Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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