No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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