census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
