Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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