woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
