i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Randomize
