Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
even my farts smell like vagina
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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