did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize