Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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