is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Randomize
