They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
