I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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