More tranny stories later!
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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